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11. Beyond Survival _ Rick Clapp _ Part 1

Updated: Nov 15, 2021


 

Today we are joined by Rick Clapp. During our conversation we explore leadership, work life balance, and how to live abundantly. Our time together uncovers nugget after nugget of insight and wisdom. Rick is a husband of 27 years, father of 6, and founder of "Beyond Survival". Highlights from this episode include: - Theory of Constraints. - The importance of self regulation. - Leading on Empty, and how to fix it. - Journey towards intentionality. - The 5% Framework - The Red, Yellow, Green Scale. - Living abundantly vs. surviving. - The Power of Full Engagement. - Why we need to learn to combine our personal and professional pursuits. Want to learn more? Check Rick's work out at: BEYOND SURVIVAL Did you find value in today’s conversation? SHARE IT!

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08;06;40;10 - 08;06;23;13

Aaron

Well, good morning, everybody, and Grit Theory, we are so glad to be here this morning with a brand new guest. You guys better, better buckle up for this guy because he's got years and years of difficulty that he's he's honed into fantastic pieces of wisdom.


08;06;22;19 - 08;06;08;27

Aaron

We're going to we're going to press into my good friend Rick Clapp. Thanks for being here today. Thanks for having me. Rick is a guy worth knowing. I've I've talked to other people who know Rick and they will say he's he talks in Proverbs.


08;06;08;27 - 08;06;00;13

Aaron

He speaks just a little quips like, huh? It just causes you pause and not to put too much pressure on you, Rick. I think.


08;06;00;13 - 08;05;59;28

Aaron

It was made.


08;05;59;28 - 08;05;59;17

Aaron

Of glass.


08;05;58;19 - 08;05;45;14

Aaron

But you really are. I mean, Rick has been doing leadership in some in some venues or another for the last 20 plus years. He's been a husband of 27 years, so bravo there. I'm sure you learned a lot through that as well.


08;05;44;28 - 08;05;37;02

Jon

And a husband or a sort of father of six kids, three boys, three girls. All right. You got a lot of people in your life, but.


08;05;37;02 - 08;05;36;08

Aaron

Activity at the.


08;05;36;08 - 08;05;34;29

Aaron

House, you too.


08;05;34;29 - 08;05;31;00

Jon

I think you're the first gentleman to be on with more kids than either of us.


08;05;30;25 - 08;05;29;21

Aaron

Oh, yeah, right?


08;05;29;21 - 08;05;26;19

Aaron

Yeah. So we're no longer with that was good.


08;05;26;15 - 08;05;21;10

Aaron

Yeah, I can be that. We're going to get lost. We got some very good Premiere.


08;05;21;01 - 08;05;11;13

Aaron

You're just telling me this is kind of cool. You said your you make a habit when your kids are seniors to do kind of a connection point with them, you know? Yeah, what you're doing.


08;05;11;08 - 08;05;07;25

Rick

Yeah, my wife and I want to do a senior trip for.


08;05;07;25 - 08;05;04;03

Aaron

Which one of our kiddos and this year is heavy.


08;05;04;02 - 08;05;01;18

Rick

And usually we do. Guys knew the guys.


08;05;01;18 - 08;04;58;18

Aaron

So I'll do with the boys or girls.


08;04;58;09 - 08;04;55;29

Rick

Yeah, but Abby wants to do backpacking.


08;04;55;23 - 08;04;52;03

Aaron

Which Laura doesn't do, so I'm excited to get her. So we're.


08;04;52;03 - 08;04;51;15

Rick

Going to do.


08;04;51;05 - 08;04;48;05

Aaron

A road trip ten days up to the northwest and.


08;04;47;13 - 08;04;46;08

Rick

Live in a van down by the.


08;04;46;08 - 08;04;45;09

Aaron

River. I love it.


08;04;44;23 - 08;04;43;25

Rick

Backpacking and.


08;04;43;16 - 08;04;41;09

Aaron

Really looking forward to that special time with her.


08;04;40;25 - 08;04;37;14

Aaron

That's excellent. And so I've never been where you're going. You know it is. I'm sorry to.


08;04;37;14 - 08;04;35;20

Aaron

Interrupt or an adventure.


08;04;34;23 - 08;04;31;13

Jon

And you mentioned, did you mention that something bigger than life happens adventure?


08;04;31;09 - 08;04;25;28

Rick

It is. Yeah, we chose to do a band life or has a sink and that maybe a little.


08;04;25;28 - 08;04;23;18

Aaron

Bit of storage and there are equipment in there, but.


08;04;23;05 - 08;04;19;05

Rick

We've never done that either. So everything is totally unexpected.


08;04;19;05 - 08;04;16;28

Aaron

We're just going to, you know, where we're.


08;04;16;18 - 08;04;15;20

Rick

Plopped down, where we.


08;04;15;20 - 08;04;12;04

Aaron

Want to stay for the night and then uproot and go to the next.


08;04;12;04 - 08;04;06;05

Aaron

one. Excellent shout out Billy ceremony in Texas and best practices for us to pass on to Rick.


08;04;06;04 - 08;04;00;20

Aaron

That's right. Any tips are welcome. You do not.


08;04;00;07 - 08;03;55;16

Aaron

Have your battery go. That's one of the ones we got. So let's make sure that batteries charged up.


08;03;54;10 - 08;03;53;29

Aaron

Yeah.


08;03;53;12 - 08;03;51;09

Aaron

Excellent. So we're this episode ten and.


08;03;50;15 - 08;03;49;22

Jon

This is episode.


08;03;49;21 - 08;03;33;18

Aaron

eleven, twelve, second episode eleven. And so we're checking on you. We've had some fantastic guys. Yes, so far. And we've just been loving what we've been learning. Rick, I also want to mention that you run a coaching consulting group, right?


08;03;33;04 - 08;03;30;03

Aaron

And so you you call yourself a leadership survival guide.


08;03;29;29 - 08;03;18;00

Rick

Yeah. Right. I don't like the title consultant or coach only because of so bland. And so I was talking with friends and because of beyond survival is.


08;03;18;00 - 08;03;06;09

Aaron

The name of our organization. They're like, What would you do something with survival guide or something like that? And I was like, All right, I'll try out. Leadership survival guide for a while to see if that sticks or is it too cheesy or whatever.


08;03;05;19 - 08;03;03;23

Rick

So I enjoy coaching.


08;03;03;23 - 08;03;02;28

Aaron

Leaders one on.


08;03;02;28 - 08;03;01;23

Rick

one and.


08;03;01;23 - 08;02;58;16

Aaron

Helping teams the direction of the leadership team retreats.


08;02;57;14 - 08;02;56;20

Rick

Helping businesses.


08;02;56;20 - 08;02;48;24

Aaron

Scale. I use that with some of my Strat ops training and also being an executive pastor for many years.


08;02;47;20 - 08;02;46;10

Rick

But mostly, I want to help.


08;02;46;02 - 08;02;42;21

Aaron

People in organizations go from just surviving but thriving.


08;02;42;14 - 08;02;41;21

Rick

And that is.


08;02;41;21 - 08;02;39;27

Aaron

Different in everyone's different contexts.


08;02;39;25 - 08;02;36;23

Rick

Yes. And and as you know, and leading in business.


08;02;36;23 - 08;02;26;27

Aaron

There's ups and downs in people's personal life. There's ups and downs. And so it's a two pronged approach meaning personal, professional or highly integrated, not separated.


08;02;26;27 - 08;02;23;18

Rick

And just really helping people gain skills.


08;02;23;06 - 08;02;20;00

Aaron

So that they feel like they're thriving and not just a threat.


08;02;19;16 - 08;02;08;07

Aaron

That's outside. That's why I like that leadership survival guide, because it kind of gives us feeling like when you're in leadership, it's sometimes I feel like and I'm going to get it through this year is the higher up you go.


08;02;08;07 - 08;01;56;17

Aaron

And we all like, you know, as we were young, we were like, Oh, I always want to be the boss or something, and then you are. You go, Man, this is rough. I mean, you're you're the point of contact for everything and the ones that you're the one that gets.


08;01;56;17 - 08;01;49;29

Aaron

All the accolades seem very few in contrast to how many things you're quote messing up.


08;01;49;23 - 08;01;49;11

Aaron

Right? Yeah.


08;01;49;00 - 08;01;32;14

Jon

Leadership's always sexy from a distance. And yet when you combine the strong leadership from God with the beyond survival, you can kind of get a tease of. You're going for their record keeping should be for everyone listening in to shroud, unsubscribe operations, finance or training, OK?


08;01;32;06 - 08;01;23;07

Jon

And then types of organizations that you're primarily working with and locations of said organizations. Can you provide some context there? Absolutely. Donut shops.


08;01;23;04 - 08;01;19;18

Aaron

Oh yeah. Not yet.


08;01;18;29 - 08;01;16;20

Aaron

Anyone who's doing donuts let me know.


08;01;15;21 - 08;01;06;12

Rick

It's it has fallen into three categories model small to medium business leaders. This nonprofit leaders and in.


08;01;05;24 - 08;01;02;02

Aaron

Particular, church staff and church dynamics. And so.


08;01;01;13 - 08;01;00;03

Rick

The small businesses.


08;00;59;27 - 08;00;44;21

Aaron

Those people who are in startups or their business is going really well and they're getting overwhelmed by all the volume and internally scale. Learn how to scale or they're just not doing that because they're stuck doing all the things they don't want to do versus the things they're most passionate about.


08;00;44;21 - 08;00;42;00

Aaron

They're kind of why they started the business in the first place.


08;00;41;02 - 08;00;38;22

Rick

The nonprofit runs a.


08;00;38;15 - 08;00;29;28

Aaron

Startup, and the other one is go on for a while and growing and about ready to scale again. So just needing help structure focus on the most important things.


08;00;28;23 - 08;00;27;01

Rick

And then churches is different dynamics.


08;00;27;01 - 08;00;12;05

Aaron

It can be from leadership development or, as the church head is, it can be the communications pathways, engagement pathways, staff development, culture and just everything I've done as an executive pastor is pretty transferable to most churches.


08;00;12;03 - 09;59;58;00

Aaron

Wow. So have you felt like as you sat down with people that you know, if they're calling you, they're you know, most of the I mean, me personally, from a leadership perspective, it's hard for me to be proactive.


09;59;57;16 - 09;59;47;12

Aaron

It's like by the time I'm calling you, I'm like, I'm in it, you know, is there? Do you feel like you've been surprised by anything or is it kind of common what the problems are?


09;59;45;18 - 09;59;43;04

Rick

It's it's both because every.


09;59;43;04 - 09;59;40;20

Aaron

Business is unique. Every leader is unique.


09;59;40;19 - 09;59;39;12

Rick

So the dynamics.


09;59;39;09 - 09;59;36;17

Aaron

Of what's affecting their life are what's most important to.


09;59;36;17 - 09;59;30;21

Rick

Them is unique, but volume is not unique. So, you know, we.


09;59;30;21 - 09;59;28;12

Aaron

Have this water jar.


09;59;28;12 - 09;59;26;19

Rick

In front of me. It can only hold.


09;59;26;19 - 09;59;19;12

Aaron

Certain amount of hours in the second quarter. As much as I want to do it, it's going to do everywhere. If I want more water, I need a bigger fucking or something.


09;59;18;26 - 09;59;18;01

Rick

And so there's.


09;59;18;00 - 09;59;15;21

Aaron

A there's a theory called a theory of constraints.


09;59;15;15 - 09;59;13;16

Rick

In science, and that.


09;59;13;16 - 09;59;10;07

Aaron

Theory basically just.


09;59;08;24 - 09;59;04;00

Rick

Tells us that, you know, this water jug is is constrained by the.


09;59;04;00 - 09;58;58;13

Aaron

Way it's made. If you want. If you want more throughput, then you have to create different ways to make that happen.


09;58;58;12 - 09;58;52;11

Rick

So in a business, if someone was not doing slow melodic growth and then all.


09;58;52;11 - 09;58;51;03

Aaron

Of a sudden exploded.


09;58;49;21 - 09;58;48;27

Rick

And there are a.


09;58;48;18 - 09;58;46;15

Aaron

Ton of meetings each day working on their days off.


09;58;45;14 - 09;58;41;24

Rick

King, the mailbox just keeps growing. All these things.


09;58;41;24 - 09;58;40;16

Aaron

Are great signs of.


09;58;40;16 - 09;58;39;01

Rick

Volume and things that are happening.


09;58;39;01 - 09;58;35;20

Aaron

In our business. But on the flip side, that are being burnt out.


09;58;35;19 - 09;58;34;21

Rick

And so that means.


09;58;34;21 - 09;58;18;17

Aaron

That there are systems that you're using to accomplish what matters most to them to do. Their business isn't working. So when I talk to someone, they're either in extreme disarray or so excited that that opportunity is overwhelming. It's not usually anything in between.


09;58;18;02 - 09;58;16;23

Rick

So the pain is too great.


09;58;16;00 - 09;58;13;18

Aaron

Or the success is overwhelming.


09;58;12;10 - 09;58;11;16

Rick

And I think those are.


09;58;11;16 - 09;58;10;10

Aaron

two motivators already.


09;58;10;07 - 09;58;05;02

Aaron

Just honestly is a great motivator. Yeah. And if you're an entrepreneur, you're like, Oh, I can help.


09;58;04;26 - 09;58;04;10

Aaron

I can do it.


09;58;04;10 - 09;58;01;19

Rick

So you're going to you're going to keep trying to get.


09;58;01;19 - 09;58;00;03

Aaron

Up early or stay up later.


09;57;59;14 - 09;57;54;20

Rick

You're going to sacrifice your days off. You're going to do the hustle, but be in the rat race.


09;57;54;18 - 09;57;52;23

Aaron

Kind of funny how we recreate forever.


09;57;51;21 - 09;57;48;05

Rick

But at the end of the day, you just start coming to your end that, you.


09;57;48;05 - 09;57;47;04

Aaron

Know, you can't do it all.


09;57;46;16 - 09;57;44;16

Rick

And there's this great books out.


09;57;44;16 - 09;57;43;26

Aaron

There, and there's.


09;57;42;20 - 09;57;41;19

Rick

Great wisdom that.


09;57;41;11 - 09;57;36;27

Aaron

Mentors that can just share about how you can lead your business differently.


09;57;35;29 - 09;57;17;06

Aaron

You've been the conversations that I've had with you over the years. You're very enticing. Might just do more work harder all the time is that you you are a lot more. You hear a lot more intentional, which I've always appreciated about you and adding is not always the solution.


09;57;17;03 - 09;57;03;29

Aaron

Sometimes it's rarely seems like it seems like now you go, look at what you're doing right now, you to say, Are you the right guy? Are you? Are you even? You're pouring in. But have you changed the systems containing it?


09;57;03;26 - 09;57;01;06

Rick

Yeah. Well, the reason why I'm.


09;57;01;06 - 09;56;58;10

Aaron

Intentional now is because in my thirties, I wasn't.


09;56;57;15 - 09;56;53;01

Rick

And so the thirties I was blowing and going and.


09;56;51;28 - 09;56;47;22

Aaron

Thought I was having a heart attack in the church office so that.


09;56;47;11 - 09;56;43;22

Aaron

This is literal. This is really, you know, you're not just talking.


09;56;43;18 - 09;56;40;17

Rick

No, no, no, no, no. So so yeah, I came back.


09;56;40;17 - 09;56;39;25

Aaron

From lunch.


09;56;39;25 - 09;56;37;17

Rick

And had this tension in.


09;56;37;17 - 09;56;37;04

Aaron

My.


09;56;35;27 - 09;56;30;12

Rick

I don't know what, but in my chest went to my colleague and said, Hey, do you have any Tums?


09;56;30;03 - 09;56;20;29

Aaron

You know, I don't know what's going on. And he gave me some poems and I had like four and shoot them up in about ten minutes later. It was worse. And then I went back to him and said.


09;56;20;25 - 09;56;20;07

Rick

You know, those.


09;56;20;07 - 09;56;18;23

Aaron

Usually work pretty quickly as.


09;56;18;13 - 09;56;06;23

Rick

They do for me, but you don't look too good. And I'm like, What do you mean? It's like you kind of looking pale and green. And while he was saying that it was getting tighter. And he's like, I think I need to.


09;56;06;23 - 09;56;05;01

Aaron

Call 911. And I was like, No.


09;56;04;04 - 09;56;02;20

Rick

You know, and then it just got.


09;56;02;17 - 09;56;01;08

Aaron

Worse and worse. And so he.


09;56;01;08 - 09;55;58;04

Rick

Called 911. Another body that.


09;55;58;04 - 09;55;48;19

Aaron

Was on staff was a previously empty, so he's taking my pulse and they're like, You need to lay down. And I literally think I'm going to die. So I'm like, I'm not lying down.


09;55;48;02 - 09;55;46;05

Aaron

And I don't know what's going on. I'm staying up.


09;55;45;17 - 09;55;43;06

Rick

And so the ambulance.


09;55;43;06 - 09;55;41;05

Aaron

Arrives, the EMT that's like.


09;55;40;29 - 09;55;40;05

Rick

You know, read.


09;55;40;05 - 09;55;38;09

Aaron

Your heart and they give me aspirin.


09;55;37;19 - 09;55;36;01

Rick

And taken vital.


09;55;36;01 - 09;55;29;25

Aaron

Signs and so forth. And then it just stopped immediately. Just like relented.


09;55;29;03 - 09;55;22;23

Rick

And I was like, so relieved, and then the guy the EMT was like, How are you feeling?


09;55;22;23 - 09;55;20;12

Aaron

I was like, Wait until challenger disaster really works.


09;55;19;00 - 09;55;18;07

Aaron

Let's call it up.


09;55;17;21 - 09;55;16;14

Rick

And he's like, Well, your.


09;55;16;13 - 09;55;10;10

Aaron

Numbers don't look too good. We got to take you in the ambulance. And I was like, OK, whatever you need to do, I'm doing.


09;55;09;19 - 09;55;06;13

Rick

And you know, I'm feeling so alive.


09;55;06;13 - 09;55;01;24

Aaron

Because I was so fearful of dying and watching. Just turn the siren on to war, you know.


09;55;01;04 - 09;55;00;14

Rick

Like, no, you're.


09;55;00;14 - 09;54;57;28

Aaron

Not in an emergency. And I go into.


09;54;57;28 - 09;54;48;16

Aaron

The fear we all we're going to tell me I'm dying to show up. That's right. Go to lieutenant. Please make this more exciting. Yeah, more and more.


09;54;47;11 - 09;54;46;14

Rick

But that.


09;54;46;14 - 09;54;44;28

Aaron

Experience, when.


09;54;44;28 - 09;54;44;14

Rick

My wife.


09;54;44;14 - 09;54;39;24

Aaron

Walked into the room, I looked at her and I said, Disney doesn't get any clearer than this.


09;54;38;29 - 09;54;34;06

Rick

And I just knew that how I was living life, particularly, I think the job.


09;54;34;00 - 09;54;27;05

Aaron

Was hard on me and how I was allowing it to be hard on me, so. That experience took me on a different journey.


09;54;26;23 - 09;54;25;00

Rick

And it turned out to be spasms of.


09;54;25;00 - 09;54;16;10

Aaron

The esophagus, which I'm told uses all the nerves that your heart would use in a heart attack, so obviously got to experience a heart attack without having twice.


09;54;15;27 - 09;54;14;16

Rick

And I stayed the night in.


09;54;14;16 - 09;54;09;10

Aaron

The hospital and I did a stress test on blah blah to make sure I could leave.


09;54;07;07 - 09;54;04;23

Rick

But it changed me in that I.


09;54;04;23 - 09;54;02;16

Aaron

Am not regulating myself very well and.


09;54;02;07 - 09;54;01;14

Rick

My body.


09;54;01;14 - 09;54;00;05

Aaron

Is telling me something.


09;54;00;05 - 09;53;58;26

Rick

That my mind was.


09;53;58;25 - 09;53;53;10

Aaron

Telling. It was doing other things and I was pressing it to the limit where it says enough.


09;53;53;04 - 09;53;49;03

Rick

And so I laid myself.


09;53;49;03 - 09;53;44;06

Aaron

Off a week later and that our staff was going through layoffs at the time.


09;53;44;04 - 09;53;41;15

Rick

And. Laura and I had.


09;53;41;15 - 09;53;31;04

Aaron

Already had an anniversary trip planned that weekend. So that happened on a Monday released on a Tuesday. We went up to and like on her Colorado on a Saturday.


09;53;30;06 - 09;53;29;11

Rick

And we're like, we don't have.


09;53;29;11 - 09;53;26;05

Aaron

A job, but we know that this time is ending, so we.


09;53;25;26 - 09;53;18;08

Rick

Resigned. And I started a new journey and I was handed a book called Leading on.


09;53;18;08 - 09;53;00;05

Aaron

Empty by Wayne Cordeiro from a friend. And I just drink that book up because it's basically his journey of burnout. And I just resonated with it. And out of that book, birth of a new philosophy that I started living and trying.


09;53;00;05 - 09;52;59;15

Aaron

And so.


09;52;58;18 - 09;52;57;07

Rick

That journey started.


09;52;57;07 - 09;52;52;07

Aaron

Me on a journey of intentionality and learning boundaries and how to regulate myself.


09;52;52;05 - 09;52;50;16

Rick

And in the.


09;52;50;16 - 09;52;45;10

Aaron

Order of things I said was most valuable, but they and they in reality weren't being able.


09;52;44;13 - 09;52;19;15

Aaron

So you. There's someone out there is wondering because we talk about not quitting. And what you did was you're you're quitting. But it wasn't like you weren't throwing your hands up like it was their problem. That was I think that's the real difference here because we can leave a job and go the jobs that yeah, but you


09;52;19;15 - 09;52;14;18

Aaron

you're saying, I'm not. There's something wrong with how I'm running.


09;52;14;02 - 09;52;11;04

Rick

If I'm a victim, I can say it's the job and they did this.


09;52;11;04 - 09;52;08;02

Aaron

And I'm sure there were emotions there, but.


09;52;06;23 - 09;52;05;27

Rick

As I've gotten.


09;52;05;27 - 09;51;59;26

Aaron

Older, I realize I'm responsible for me. I'm responsible for my emotions, are responsible for my decisions.


09;51;59;26 - 09;51;57;28

Rick

And the reality.


09;51;57;28 - 09;51;57;14

Aaron

Was.


09;51;57;06 - 09;51;54;25

Rick