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10. Rest, Do More



 

Today we explore the concept of rejuvenation and rest through the intentional pursuit of change. Change in activity, change in environment, and change in perspective. This concept was championed by Winston Churchill and later expanded upon Brett and Kate McKay in their "Sunday Fireside" article "Change is the Master Key". In addition to this topic we also announce an exciting update, as well as celebrate our 10th episode on The Grit Theory. Highlights in this episode include: - Challenging the concept of what is now considered "rest" - Exploring a myriad of alternatives in "rest through change" - The importance of self care - Rest as a discipline and need If you would like to learn more about Brett and Kate McKay, and there work, check out their website at: THE ART OF MANLINESS Another article worth checking out "A Change IS a Rest" Did you find value in today’s conversation? SHARE IT!

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08;06;40;08 - 08;06;29;19

Jon

Welcome, everyone. This is an exciting episode because we have two fun announcements today. one is just recognizing where we are in the early stages of this journey. When episode number.


08;06;29;19 - 08;06;27;03

Aaron

six, this is episode ten and.


08;06;27;01 - 08;06;26;14

Jon

We're shooting in.


08;06;26;14 - 08;06;20;00

Aaron

Adobe. Yes, this is a very cool. It is cool. The decathlon of podcasting.


08;06;19;21 - 08;06;11;02

Jon

Yes, this is the. Episode ten means 20 weeks of consistency to do this. Yeah, which is pretty neat.


08;06;10;24 - 08;06;10;10

Aaron

Yeah.


08;06;09;07 - 08;06;00;03

Jon

And what we feel incredibly grateful for is we are well over 750 downloads at this point. So thank you again for tuning in.


08;05;59;25 - 08;05;39;13

Aaron

And loving the feedback we get from us channels Texas, Facebook, people just calling us, even emails we've got from people either directly impacted or someone in their circle that heard it, that needed to hear something that is that is the most fun to hear and how it's specifically helping or or is it making people think in a


08;05;39;13 - 08;05;39;00

Aaron

different way?


08;05;38;14 - 08;05;28;17

Jon

It really is, and I think we've both been incredibly encouraged by that, which kind of goes into the second phone announcement that we're going to be working to fulfill. And what is that?


08;05;27;24 - 08;05;09;01

Aaron

Yeah. So we're thing with all the receptivity that is happening. How can we not do weekly podcasts and get get more content out there? We found that we're having more topics in our brain, more discussions that we want to have than we have, that we have scheduled events to do so.


08;05;07;26 - 08;05;04;26

Jon

Yeah. So all that being said, this is the last of said.


08;05;03;16 - 08;04;59;23

Aaron

I was like, Are we really rebranding right now?


08;04;59;11 - 08;04;44;02

Jon

It is over. Pretty excited to work. It's also a weekly podcast and see where we can go so today. So those are two fun things like episode ten and we're we're going to go weekly and we'll see where this journey takes us, huh?


08;04;43;25 - 08;04;26;15

Aaron

Absolutely. And again, just just humbled. Like, I think as you do more of this, it just makes your mind think in a way that's like, OK, what else do I? It's I think as we talk, it's a gift one to yourself, but also to those people who are engaging in the conversation.


08;04;26;06 - 08;04;20;27

Aaron

And so it just makes it kind of exponential like, I have to do more of this. I want to have more conversations like this.


08;04;20;26 - 08;04;03;22

Jon

It's very rewarding. It's like endorphin rush from doing exercise or like how you feel good. If you eat something fresh, you know it just feels good and. And it's not like there's anything being special, one of the things I was thinking about that I enjoyed about this is you and I have a deliberate time, just have a


08;04;03;22 - 08;03;48;15

Jon

conversation. And then I think about how with COVID and everything else, there's been so much isolation. So I think this is an opportunity for us to have a genuine conversation with people regardless of where they are and that we can all participate.


08;03;48;15 - 08;03;46;03

Jon

You know, it's another means for that. So it's fun.


08;03;45;08 - 08;03;30;05

Aaron

I think it's funny when we hang out. It's funny because I think of it like, historically, what would this be? What would what would be the equivalent? And to me, it's like if Aristotle and Socrates were just hanging out in the gym and having a conversation.


08;03;29;09 - 08;03;19;23

Aaron

Not that we're at that level, but it's it's not. It's a very atypical gym scenario. I mean, the musings we have while lifting weights is that it's great.


08;03;19;22 - 08;03;09;18

Jon

That is definitely the ideal when we are like the lemmings hanging free, watching them all scratching our heads because I don't think we're.


08;03;08;27 - 08;02;55;11

Aaron

Yeah. Well, you know what it's like simultaneously, like John Wayne and Clint Eastwood, we're building a fence together. I mean, that's just it's it's the craziest kind of minds and actions that work together.


08;02;54;27 - 08;02;47;23

Jon

Very funny analogies. Yeah. And we're like the Wimpy Kid brothers. Yeah, right? Keep up with them. Hey, dad, how do you do that? That was fun.


08;02;47;21 - 08;02;47;08

Aaron

Yeah, I.


08;02;46;21 - 08;02;16;20

Jon

Think that's really neat. So yeah, today's is a is a phone conversation. We I read an article published by Grant McKay Wilburn and Kate McKay. Excuse me. They are co-founders of the argument on this podcast and community, which is a really unique community that really just looks at restoring or helping encourage good ideals and manners, etiquette, character


08;02;16;19 - 08;01;56;16

Jon

dressing properly, you know, self-help things like that. Just kind of fun things. And in this article and specific it's called Changes Master Key. I read it a long time ago when it was published. Well, I read I was introduced to it before this was published, I thought he was very concise in the way of bringing it up


08;01;56;04 - 08;01;26;04

Jon

. And he reintroduced me to a quote from Benjamin Seasonably. From Winston Churchill, I completely misspoke there about how change is incredibly important in rejuvenation, in the context, the backdrop is, you know, World War two, Winston Churchill going at it, consistently continuing violence through the fight with Nazi Germany and all the things that go with that are being


08;01;25;22 - 08;01;11;09

Jon

bombed. And, you know, obviously there's a bit of pressure, right? There's a lot of work. And how do you keep sharp when you have a lot in the book, you know? And I figured you could read. Churchill's quote.


08;01;10;12 - 08;00;50;12

Jon

And then just have a conversation, because when I heard Churchill's quote a few years ago, it affected how I live my life significantly and then revisiting this and it's a real short article, I was able to share it much more tangibly with people, and it seems to whoever I've shared it with him seemed to like it, especially


08;00;50;12 - 08;00;47;15

Jon

when we can talk about some examples of how life personally affects you, right?


08;00;47;01 - 08;00;32;13

Aaron

And I would say this is a backdrop to qualify. Churchill speaking about this. Are you going to talk about we? You've all heard Churchill, but you may or may not be aware of the intense mental pressure he was under while being bombed by Germany.


08;00;32;13 - 08;00;13;02

Aaron

His nation was all but losing the war. He had to be the voice of strength and perseverance for a nation that was losing hope. So for him to be mentally rested sort of like then it's that whole thing in the in the airplane.


08;00;13;02 - 09;59;57;01

Aaron

I to tell you to put your breathing mask on first before you go help others like he had to be very, very intentional about making sure that he was healthy so he can get behind that, Mike. So when he says something, I get whatever quote he has like Perk, and what he was going through is nothing like


09;59;57;01 - 09;59;55;28

Aaron

I've ever heard.


09;59;55;16 - 09;59;38;09

Jon

I agree he's earned it right. He's earned some respect regardless of. No one is perfect, but he's certainly respected the value do so absolute because it's a bit contradictory on how we dress. Yes, and that is the thing here.


09;59;38;09 - 09;59;21;10

Jon

When you think change, think rest. So here I just read this real quick and we'll be talking to. All right. So Winston Churchill put it this way, and they can wear out a particular part of his mind by continually using it in target.


09;59;20;25 - 09;59;05;28

Jon

And this tired part can be restored and strengthened not merely by race, but by using other parts. It is not enough merely to switch off the lights, which play upon the main and ordinary field of interest. A new field of interest must be eliminated.


09;59;04;27 - 09;58;55;12

Jon

It is only when news sells for cold interactivity, when new stars become the lords of the ascendant, that relief repose refreshment are for you.


09;58;52;06 - 09;58;29;10

Aaron

So does that mean? OK, well, let's see what it does say, what does it mean first? So I think rest Western mindset, right? OK, so let's just call it what it is. We think we think it's sitting on the couch watching Netflix or something, or it's sitting on the beach and those are types of breast, right?


09;58;28;29 - 09;58;11;29

Aaron

But it's not all. The rest is rest. Is it not moving? That's what this is challenging. It's not. It's not saying it's closing your eyes or being sentient is distressed. It's saying something entirely different. What are your thoughts on that?


09;58;11;11 - 09;57;48;08

Jon

Yeah, I think that premise is accurate. All right. What I really like is the juxtaposition. Like, if you think about it's like, Okay, what is change, right? So if you think, well, I work with my mind of things like all day, like if your jobs is your mind or computer work, things like that, then rest would be


09;57;48;08 - 09;57;37;24

Jon

getting to work with your hands. You know, working on leather, working, painting, whatever, you know anything. If you're indoors, outdoors, the juxtaposition we get outside.


09;57;37;19 - 09;57;11;23

Aaron

This is lost, I think right now. And on men specifically, I'm not coming women from this. But men have, I think, forgotten the art of finding a good, healthy hobby to give their mind a rest. Because this article does challenge that, we may be fatiguing ourselves even more when we go home by the types of rest we


09;57;11;23 - 09;57;01;08

Aaron

have. And that's what it really hit me between the eyes. I'm not sure, are you? I guess this is the big question that we're tackling. Are you resting well? And what should that look like?


09;57;00;27 - 09;56;43;16

Jon

Well, I think that what happens is there's a lot of incentivization to Netflix, and Chill is there. There's a lot of money that is spent to encourage us to scroll Instagram and mostly to play video games, to watch movies, to watch shows.


09;56;43;09 - 09;56;22;02

Jon

And that is how you spend your evening. That's how you spend your time. That's not working. There's nothing wrong with any of those things inherently or, you know, the proper portion. But when they when those entities get what I think they want, which is you come home, you eat dinner, preferably watching something and you put your brain


09;56;22;02 - 09;56;01;12

Jon

into like a state of idol, right? Like it's an engine idling and just being cold in whatever direction it shows are or whatever direction your you're out of some choices, then they're getting to advertise and make profits. And so on the one hand, I think that is what over time we've been taught.


09;56;00;08 - 09;55;45;03

Jon

So it's not just like, Oh, we've chosen it, we've also been instructed and encouraged and rewarded for. Glamorized. And the problem is that I do think it's a lot like you can't I don't feel refreshed if I watch a movie with my family.


09;55;45;03 - 09;55;33;14

Jon

It's fun. But if I come home and don't do anything else and just watch shows for the evening, I don't feel good. I don't feel any form of rejuvenation. I go to bed just as hard. Yeah.


09;55;32;29 - 09;55;15;19

Aaron

And we feel that the next morning, I feel like often we go instead of having a sense of I'm, I have an energy to give to the the 8:10 hour a day or whatever you give to it. You have more of a sense of I just got to get through this and get back to the thing.


09;55;15;19 - 09;54;57;04

Aaron

The rest becomes more the ego versus the rest, fueling the larger part of your life, your weight, waking life. It's it's kind of madness, really. It's like living for the weekend, but you have five days of work, so that seems kind of opposite to me.


09;54;57;04 - 09;54;54;23

Aaron

That's a lot. That's a lot of time to not let your life.


09;54;54;05 - 09;54;35;23

Jon

one name get in even more or in line with that. Oh no. A lot of people that are working in front of the screen all day. In some form of like a building. So how how much do things just?


09;54;34;24 - 09;54;18;02

Jon

Blend together if you spend all day in front of a computer screen and then you go home and you're watching TV or something like the content may change, but there's nothing to add spice to your life when you're just in the same circumstances.


09;54;18;02 - 09;54;11;26

Jon

Different scenarios like the same situation, different circumstances. For the majority of you're wasting time.


09;54;11;04 - 09;53;58;17

Aaron

Let me ask you this question, because this is, I think this this becomes sometimes the. The conversation we have in our own head with. Is it if it's fun? Is that the same thing as rest?


09;53;56;19 - 09;53;36;02

Jon

I think I think it can be. I think there's another element, though, that. The thing that I think this idea really calls out, right, is. I think there's a restful joy giving productivity that's being missed in what most people consider rest.


09;53;35;20 - 09;53;17;14

Jon

Hmm. So. If instead of just watching four hours of TV, your home or something like that, you decide you want to go for the walk with the dogs or with yourself, you decide you want to try and draw something or pick up some hobby or whatever.


09;53;17;09 - 09;52;56;17

Jon

You know what you start to realize as you're accomplishing things in these leisure activities and you're you get rejuvenated by that. But the reason, right? one of the reasons I enjoy. Training is because a very, very rare circumstances in my job.


09;52;56;14 - 09;52;47;27

Jon

Would I ever need to like that? So it's a fun spark of vibrance, you know, in the morning and it were.


09;52;47;27 - 09;52;46;10

Aaron

Very different from what you're doing and.


09;52;46;09 - 09;52;34;08

Jon

Very different. I mean, I guess the rest. And then the same thing's true, you know, once the family's in bed, I could share the screen again, which I'm going to do for typically ten to twelve hours the next day.


09;52;33;10 - 09;52;06;14

Jon

Or I can come up and experience the richness of the smell and feeling of leather or wood that I'm working on or in the paper that I'm right. You know, it's just there's this really, there's a reward of creating something that I think is extremely valuable that you can lose when you just consume media.


09;52;06;10 - 09;52;06;01

Jon

I mean.


09;52;05;21 - 09;51;53;14

Aaron

I had it. So the other part of this article is talking about how we can overuse those parts of our brains. So what starts off as fun becomes something that's really fatiguing you? So like, I like my job, I wouldn't do it if I didn't like it.


09;51;53;07 - 09;51;39;01

Aaron

But at some point it tires me out because I'm doing that same thing. And so the point of this article is speaking to that part of your mind needs to be rested. You need to engage different part of your brain.


09;51;38;11 - 09;51;23;14

Aaron

It's not unlike kind of switching muscle groups or switching topics of conversation can be refreshing. Like, OK, you know, we've all been kind of tired of talking about this. You know, let's talk about something else. Rest that we can come back to it later.


09;51;21;10 - 09;51;09;11

Aaron

So what we're speaking to is, what does it look like? And this is something I want to. I'm going to play a little game with you, John, here in just a minute, but I'm not going to games. Yeah, this is ahead.


09;51;09;03 - 09;50;49;12

Aaron

This may be a correction in a minute, but. And if you do some thing, whatever your job is, what is it that can allow you to switch? That's not your job. I, you know, I tell people I work with, it's like, you want me arrested when I'm arrested, I'm great.


09;50;49;07 - 09;50;39;19

Aaron

I want to do. But when I'm tired, you don't want me at the front. You don't want me on the steering wheel anymore. I need to give me that arrest. It's worth it. Give me that day. We don't bother me.


09;50;39;08 - 09;50;17;19

Aaron

I don't bother you. You know, whatever I need to shut down. Sometimes I have a job that's very tough. Conversation heavy. So oftentimes arrest looks like, for me, something it's very non-speaking, but it can be very physical. I think I'm good because my physical muscles are fine and rested, but my mental mental muscles are done.


09;50;16;21 - 09;50;04;15

Aaron

OK, so let's do this. So here's the game on what? Let me give you some jobs. And let me give you and I want you to tell me what you think their arrest should be about could be could be OK.


09;50;04;12 - 09;49;49;12

Aaron

Oh yeah, it's been pretty imposing, isn't it? And if you will, yeah, if you're doing something else, you're right. All right. All right. So all right. So you mentioned Computer Lab at the computer screen all day, typing away that entry, whatever you doing?


09;49;49;03 - 09;49;45;16

Aaron

What does that person do for us? Do you think? What could they do?


09;49;44;29 - 09;49;24;16

Jon

I think. Anything that gets them away from the screen and doing something with their hands and engaging with some form of natural nature or natural items, right? So I. For that one, just to list off three bin outside for a walk right in absorbing what you can see.


09;49;22;14 - 09;49;01;20

Jon

Picking something up you can do with your hands like I need some leather working and woodworking samples there. I also tend animals, right? Among other things, and that's really the shit like I love, there's there's a picture with this article, just as it did working at a computer and then it shows it do do woodworking and it's


09;49;01;20 - 09;48;49;16

Jon

just like, hey, like you still in a building in the garage, right? It doesn't. It doesn't matter. It's just you're changing the dynamics to awakening more of your senses. You can smell it. Feel it, touch it. You engage with it.


09;48;49;15 - 09;48;34;27

Jon

Become one in that moment of enjoyment. Allow your mind to wander. I'm working in front of computer all day. I typically finish by doing around, checking on my animals, doing chores associated with them and go from there.


09;48;34;11 - 09;48;32;06

Aaron

OK, so how about like a FedEx worker?


09;48;31;21 - 09;48;25;13

Jon

OK, FedEx worker. So is, by the way. Thank you all delivery folks out there. Yes.


09;48;24;29 - 09;48;22;21

Aaron

I know you're working hard this last year, for sure.


09;48;22;00 - 09;48;00;07

Jon

So lots of driving, assuming the delivery driver wasn't driving lots of running back and forth. You know, I've thought sometimes about one of the benefits of doing that is if you can listen to podcasts or books. Yes, driving and engage in that conversation with great minds like through podcasts and books, right?


09;47;58;06 - 09;47;44;28

Jon

So when you get back from that and I'm glad you asked the question and I don't want to steal whatever your next job is going to be. So you're already walking a bit, you're already driving and you're focused on efficiency and productivity.


09;47;44;24 - 09;47;27;27

Jon

Right? How quickly can I drive a good weekend if you struck out? Yeah, hopefully you're maximizing that time to learn why you're doing it. I think that when we jump into my mind is. Pursuing some sort of whimsical beauty, right, allowing yourself for creativity.


09;47;27;02 - 09;47;09;06

Jon

Right, that would be the change because your entire day's focus on getting from A to B to C as swiftly and efficiently and effectively as possible. Under a tight timeline, so freeing yourself from a timeline and allowing some fun in pursuit of beauty or joy.


09;47;09;05 - 09;47;08;26

Jon

You know.


09;47;08;17 - 09;47;02;24

Aaron

It's yeah, that and does it have time constraints? Yeah. Like just going to be somewhere or.


09;47;02;24 - 09;46;48;29

Jon

Even if it has a constraint like an hour or two, you know, because you have other requirements or whatever that is. It's not like I have seven minutes to get through this experience. Okay, for the next hour. I can do whatever I want and not think about it.


09;46;48;03 - 09;46;39;17

Jon

And whatever that might be, and it's for shooting something that sparks life. You know, that's what I thought would be my first guess.


09;46;39;10 - 09;46;23;29

Aaron

That's good. That's good. I don't want to be. I think it's so nonverbal. I don't want to be around people. I can just kind of be free with, you know, not talk about anything. You know, this muse a little bit.


09;46;23;11 - 09;46;15;26

Aaron

Get out of sort of like a automaton. You know, if you have what the kids play with the kids, yes. But yeah.


09;46;15;08 - 09;46;00;18

Jon

Real quick, fun thing they're in and I can do better at. This is being intentional to just get on your hands and knees and roughhouse around. Hmm. Right? Yeah, I'm just re-experience the joy in that. It's awesome. Yeah.


09;46;00;15 - 09;45;57;18

Jon

Executes day, frankly. Makes your day.


09;45;57;11 - 09;45;45;25

Aaron

Yeah. You wouldn't. Even you wouldn't even think that'd be a restful thing to get out and roll around and stuff. But I dare you not to smile after wrestling or get them, and it's so refreshing.


09;45;45;20 - 09;45;25;24

Jon

Well, let's switch from the services to Good Morning America back on track. I saw this really interesting picture on something I don't remember, and it was like a cartoon for teenagers drawing thing instead of like a dad. Walking home with grocery bags and socks and tired shows like a battery with the right bar above and then at


09;45;25;24 - 09;45;06;12

Jon

the door and walks in the door and sets the bags, batteries, Rybar and any structures needed to give his little girl hug and like the batteries? Yeah, yeah. And I loved the action, and I think it's true, and I think that there's this and that insane reward that she juxtaposed.


09;45;06;12 - 09;44;51;15

Jon

I just saw another article over. Some person was wanting to hear about more people affirming their regret to have children or the reasons they're proud they don't have kids. And I was just like, You are a despicable, disgusting creature.


09;44;50;26 - 09;44;30;09

Jon

Like, I hate you. Like in the way I want you to go away and disappear because I think that you are spreading a lie that's robbing the others of feeling and embracing and pursuing because it is an active pursuit and joy to embrace parenting, you know, because if you don't, then you can become jaded and then you're


09;44;30;09 - 09;44;26;12

Jon

ruining your life and your children. You know, one other, you know.


09;44;25;28 - 09;44;25;14

Aaron

That's good.


09;44;25;05 - 09;44;22;01

Jon

Elon Musk added, There's been a push for.


09;44;21;22 - 09;44;18;24

Aaron

The some, so maybe soft or something.


09;44;18;20 - 09;44;15;17

Jon

He's a genius. He's not. He doesn't do much.


09;44;14;17 - 09;44;14;12

Aaron

Yeah.


09;44;11;26 - 09;44;10;11

Jon

He'll be remembered for years.


09;44;10;03 - 09;44;09;29

Aaron

Yeah.


09;44;09;00 - 09;43;49;07

Jon

But he was talking about, Hey, like my kids asked me. I chose to participate in whatever actions you bring them about, so they don't owe me anything I owe them. And and I loved and I loved that, and I was like, also refreshing to see someone with his influence perpetuating that because each one of us has the


09;43;49;07 - 09;43;25;21

Jon

opportunity either to support someone who has kids and encourage them. And that even if for whatever reasons they know or choose not to, they can still be supportive of that endeavor because otherwise we'll go to extremes or. They can re-embrace their duties as Parenthoods, I'm speaking to myself here as much as anything and find and cultivate the


09;43;25;20 - 09;43;14;12

Jon

joining the destructiveness in it and the goodness in it. And that's one way you can speak some truth and bring some change into work and stuff.


09;43;14;03 - 09;42;50;29

Aaron

Unlike other on the back of it, you said there about somebody trying to affirm their discontent of being a parent. So I that really, to me, is true of anything. This is why I just I really challenged ungrateful thinking, especially when it comes to work.


09;42;49;28 - 09;42;33;14

Aaron

I get it. We all have jobs that suck at times. You can change that situation. But while you're in it, be grateful. If you're making money, you're doing better than most of the world. And like a lot of money here in comparison to people, be thankful for that.


09;42;33;14 - 09;42;21;23

Aaron

Be grateful for that. It's just a lot. That's a lot of hours. It's a lot of energy to be sitting, being a parent and in discounting the fact I've spent time with my kids, I guess for some time I got to go do this.


09;42;21;23 - 09;42;11;29

Aaron

And the more you focus on the negativity of that thing is it's just going to grow and grow and grow, and you're not going to get any life from innocent people, steal from you. Mm-Hmm. And the reality is not going away.


09;42;11;27 - 09;42;06;01

Aaron

So to me, it's a lesson in insanity. Yeah.


09;42;04;02 - 09;41;35;06

Jon

It is a lesson in saving and misery loves company and lizards, Monitise, because, you know, just like with with. You know, we're attacking a crock of lies here that we're afraid to believe is true. And I don't think it is, you know, like rest is just just watching TV, you know, avoid responsibility for comfort and the joys


09;41;35;06 - 09;41;15;14

Jon

and lifting the responsibility to embracing the relationship with your spouse or your partner or your friend. That is, you know, going through a difficulty. It's it's looking at yourself hard in the mirror to figure out how the heck do any better is remembering and like, Oh, just parts me that are absolutely despicable.


09;41;15;13 - 09;41;03;26

Jon

You know, it's looking at the fact that we out of kids and I've been a complete loser with them. Yeah, you know, or maybe not that you're getting slammed, but I'm sure I could do better and it will further improve them.


09;41;03;18 - 09;41;01;03

Jon

And maybe that, you know, whatever so that.


09;41;00;18 - 09;40;47;26

Aaron

I am giving them my all to do. So I didn't shout. Callback to episode one, we talked about watering that what you got to make a choice to do that. Here's where I'm guilty is that I know I want to do.


09;40;47;25 - 09;40;30;01

Aaron

There's things that I have priorities for, but I'm tired. I don't. That's why I really think this discussion is so incredibly important because you just won't do those things if you're if you're fatigued. And so the challenge will be, OK, what do you do about it?


09;40;30;01 - 09;40;16;11

Aaron

I going be arrested, you know, because being in a constant, fatigued state is unacceptable. You have to find a way. We talked about finish lines before another podcast like you have to. You have to find a place where you stop.


09;40;14;19 - 09;40;00;15

Aaron

So that you can rest and then get back to it and then love what you're doing and not go to the drudgery of it. It's amazing how a rested mind this has so much more potential than one that's just like all gassed up.


09;39;58;22 - 09;39;45;12

Jon

Yeah, I mean, I don't know about you when I'm done with my work day and I'm transitioning to family mode until my wife's going to bed when at the end of that period of time. My commitment is to my family, right?


09;39;44;28 - 09;39;24;08

Jon

I can't just walk in the door and I've had you over like, I'm not ready right now. I'm done working to be engaged as a father, husband or friend. You know, I'm fatigue. Maybe grumpy, maybe just in the zone because I'm not there, I'm not connected.


09;39;23;24 - 09;39;10;08

Jon

So there's so many ways that people self-medicate that maybe it's a beer. Maybe it's just sitting in front of a TV. Maybe it's the, you know, the Instagram thing. Maybe it's exercise on a positive note or getting outside or doing a craft for a little bit of time.


09;39;10;05 - 09;38;51;09

Jon

one of the things, especially now that I'm not commuting as much, is when I'm done. And I've done experiments because I have a love hate relationship with like, you know, a lot of tasty beverage, I have to be very careful that doesn't take too much of a place in my life, you know, so it's a continuous thing


09;38;51;09 - 09;38;33;14

Jon

we talk about and put parameters around and stuff. And if you're, you know, everyone's going to watch their pleasures because their pleasures can become their masters, right? But one of the things that I really work, you and I can do functionally and justify it if I'm falling under a time crunch is I just go for a short


09;38;33;14 - 09;38;16;28

Jon

walk, you know, three or five minutes in the way I justify it. I have some animal in my life that needs some form of care so I can just pay me to go check the chickens or whatever. I'm going to just take the dog out, or I just need to see the women my a few minutes of


09;38;16;28 - 09;38;02;07

Jon

your life or just walk down the street. You know, it doesn't matter. But I'll just go on that walk. Be intentional about my breathing and really try to focus my mind on absorbing the visuals around me, the movement, the activity, the energy.


09;38;01;18 - 09;37;46;15

Jon

And I've noticed that just by being outside for three to five minutes, I can come back in the door and they really intentional about my breathing, focusing on disturbing things visually and smelling hearing. And just like, try to activate my senses three to five minutes and come back in.


09;37;46;10 - 09;37;38;17

Jon

And I'm much more ready. I just like intentionally turn the key to become, you know, family guy and friend. Yes.


09;37;38;07 - 09;37;18;10

Aaron

Yeah. And that's that's such a good rhythm to to be very cognizant of. I this is something like me personally concerned to come back to this like these rhythms break all the time and much, much like really any healthy rhythm you're going to be, you're going to feel like not doing it sometimes.


09;37;18;10 - 09;37;05;04

Aaron

Or you'll break out of those rhythms. But knowing that that has such benefit and being able to to engage that and use it as a tool to get that mind back. And that's what we're talking about here. These are sometimes rest.


09;37;04;19 - 09;36;50;05

Aaron

It doesn't feel fun at first, the activity. But as you get into it, and especially once you get an even at the end of it, when you realize it, it's it's amazing how your mind is just open to all kinds of different possibilities to the relationships around you.


09;36;49;18 - 09;36;40;05

Jon

Absolutely. I can't take full credit for like that and you just go for a short walk for the reset basement. My my, Brian Lindsey, helped me discover I needed to figure something.


09;36;40;05 - 09;36;37;09

Aaron

Out as they as they do when I hear that.


09;36;37;02 - 09;36;29;29

Jon

So a few years ago, she said, How about you get out of the house for take a breather and come back in? You're ready, OK? You know, kind of a wake up call.


09;36;29;29 - 09;36;21;05

Aaron

No evidence and then you need to get out. Now, some guys, which is like code for we're kind of sick of your personality right now. I need you to fix that.


09;36;20;10 - 09;36;06;21

Jon

Fix yourself. And what's nice is now it's like now that we've been in habit of these changes that have you, you know, flip the switch yet, you know, for one. Yeah, yeah. And it's like that security Nicolas Cage tonight.


09;36;06;21 - 09;36;05;03

Jon

Maybe I'd be more vigilant. I need to be.


09;36;04;10 - 09;35;50;27

Aaron

Up and back in five minutes. Yeah, right. That's right. That's right. I mean, I think like other people out there, you know, construction guys. Yeah, and then there's a CEO, they're going to rest different when they get home.


09;35;49;20 - 09;35;38;09

Aaron

To your point, I think I would challenge a rest cycle of rhythm, rest cycle that has to do with something that can be damaging to your mind or your time, you know, so you got to decide what that is.


09;35;37;26 - 09;35;23;20

Aaron

But there are things that can if they replace something that's more sustainable, then that that can be dangerous, right? So a walk is very sustainable, you know, nobody's going to argue with that. So if you think.


09;35;22;28 - 09;35;11;25

Jon

Well, what's fun is in the construction CEO, but it's very draining in very different ways, right? Yep. Like looking at the construction line, the immediate thing that jumps into my mind, they're working with their hands and their bodies.


09;35;11;10 - 09;34;54;02

Jon

Right? So maybe it is some sort of value creation through technology or learning something they want to know, writing a book, doing some art. You know the funding with the CEO? I think that's closer. Can you know you're leading an organization in Churchill?


09;34;54;02 - 09;34;34;03

Jon

one of his things he did was he had a number of ways of changes that he did so quickly. But one of them was he doing it? Hmm. You paint very regularly and. That that kind of comes from the idea of like your entire focus is on productivity, results, efficiency and those types of things.


09;34;33;20 - 09;34;11;18

Jon

There is there's a joy in pursuing beauty and creativity to whatever level you can. And that one really struck me when I was reviewing this for today's conversation. I think that the pursuit of. Whimsical beauty and joy as a juxtaposition to efficiency productivity in stuff like that.


09;34;10;27 - 09;33;58;11

Jon

It was just really caustic. That's something that I can tap into to help charge because I spend most of my time in active pursuit of just efficiency and effectiveness.


09;33;57;19 - 09;33;35;26

Aaron

I agree I love. So my job is very contract heavy conversation negotiation. So I I enjoy things that when you say whimsical, I think I like just some good comedy. You know, I like just if it's just a short YouTube or if it's do or just pick up the phone with somebody I know I'm going to laugh


09;33;35;26 - 09;33;16;05

Aaron

with. That's what I need because I'm it's so sterile what I do sometimes that I need something that is that doesn't have the boundaries of ABCD, you know, paragraphs and such points and all these kind of things. I need the freedom to be to have some levity.


09;33;14;05 - 09;32;57;09

Aaron

By the way, that you're talking about Elon Musk, his SNL monologue. Very funny. Take a look at it. Do you like that kind of stuff? Because he's so you on is he's he's diagnosed with. And that.


09;32;56;25 - 09;32;55;27

Jon

You can't forget.


09;32;55;26 - 09;32;42;12

Aaron

I can't think I can't. I'll think of it in a minute, but anyway, he has his personality is when he speaks monotone and you can't tell if he's being serious or if he's joking all the time and he doesn't make Asperger's.


09;32;42;03 - 09;32;30;24

Aaron

He doesn't. He can't make eye contact with anybody. That's his thing. Is he diagnosed with that? That's the East. That's he says. He said, Yeah, this is I'm Asperger's, OK, I'm going around or just, this is out there.


09;32;30;24 - 09;32;17;11

Aaron

I want to make sure that, yeah, unless he's joking, but I'm not wrong. Yeah. But anyway, just like he has his awkward personality wise, and if you've ever seen him on interviews, but he's as fun to watch. And so I just I just love like finding.


09;32;16;00 - 09;32;04;20

Aaron

The human spirit that likes to smile and laugh and enjoy things, because sometimes my view of life, because it's such a long part of my day is like life is very black and white and all that kind of stuff.


09;32;04;19 - 09;31;56;16

Aaron

I have to challenge that in my rest times so I can go back to it and realize I am too jaded. I don't get into a situation like this is all life is.


09;31;55;25 - 09;31;41;00

Jon

Yeah, and I'm thinking about it at some. As we're talking, I'm just remembering and somebody said we're very intentional about. Twice a week. They need either go and do some sort of a game night or a karaoke thing at a spot they like.


09;31;40;25 - 09;31;26;23

Jon

Yeah. And I was always a strange way to spend time with our circumstance really different. But in hindsight, it's like, No, that is a close call. Ultra positive, fun connection with people that you can just be funny on yourself with.


09;31;26;10 - 09;31;03;22

Jon

And at that time, our working very seriously professional. So it's like, how cool is that? Just going and watching TV? You're intentionally leaving your house to go engage with mostly strangers to do some fun pursuit. Yes, right? Whether it be scrabble or, you know, basketball or karaoke, it didn't matter is just this fun expense of energy connecting


09;31;03;22 - 09;31;01;00

Jon

with other human beings. And I was like, Oh, that's cool.


09;31;00;28 - 09;30;47;02

Aaron

It's not about the action itself or what you're actually doing. It's it's the fact that you're doing something different than what you have to do eight, ten hours a day. I think people who have that balance are the ones that really do well at their craft.


09;30;46;23 - 09;30;29;26

Aaron

Whatever their daily job is, if they have a good way of disengaging their mind and switching that muscle, giving a little rest. And then they come back just fully rested and love what they do. And there's they're the eyes light up when they get there in the morning, it's the employee everybody hates.


09;30;29;15 - 09;30;22;16

Aaron

It's like they've found a way to be rested to the night. You know, I'd be jealous of that a little bit, you know, figure out how to get there. Yeah.


09;30;21;19 - 09;30;06;11

Jon

Absolutely. There's one other scenario. That I really appreciated. Brett calling out and given that was written by him and his wife, I don't have to give credit to, I'm going to assume Kate, you know.


09;30;06;07 - 09;30;05;15

Aaron

From the article.


09;30;05;08 - 09;29;50;02

Jon

From the article, and I'll just read it because I think he said it well enough. I can't. I'm not seeing a way to improve upon it. So it's if the only conversation and quotations you make during the days with toddlers dialog with a great friend or a great book at night.


09;29;49;10 - 09;29;29;27

Jon

Yes. Yes. Key to the conversation. It yeah. If you if you're a parent in general, especially parenting is your occupation. one his hands off to you. You're performing one of the most important professions. Yeah, that as a species you can say well done to.


09;29;29;22 - 09;29;26;01

Jon

You're not crazy. Yes. Get yourself some good conversation.


09;29;25;25 - 09;29;24;24

Aaron

You can go crazy.


09;29;24;24 - 09;29;19;27

Jon

Yeah. Book podcasts. Anything conversation? Not with a child.


09;29;19;13 - 09;29;01;29

Aaron

And I heard it. I love it when ladies get together and I've heard this so many times, it's so good to have adult conversation. You know, maybe you said that before, because even listening to Mom, I'm hungry and all this all day long, and it's like, it's fine at first and it's cute at first.


09;29;01;29 - 09;28;58;25

Aaron

We have all of that and it's endearing until it's not.